To The Girl In The Mirror
I left you.
A long time ago.
I was ashamed of you and your rough edges, your imperfections, your weaknesses. So I moved on without you and became someone who fit in more easily.
Every now and then I caught a glimpse of you and it took me by surprise, like a kick in the stomach. I remembered you were in there. Silenced. Groomed. Unrecognisable. Lonely. Unloved.
I almost made it too and then one day, like a bolt out of the blue I realised that living a life without you is pointless. Not actually living at all really.
I was a shell, a husk, a robot.
New people were learning to love someone who wasn’t actually real. Old friends missed the me they once knew.
Sure, its hard to accept you just the way you are.
The way you snort when you laugh.
The tactless words that escape from your mouth.
The ice-cream you need to inhale from the carton.
The rolls of flesh when you bend over.
The point of your nose and the frizz of your hair left to itself.
But I am working on it. Forgive me. Let’s be friends. Let’s be us.
I will take you to the sea and let you jump and laugh and I won’t hide you away anymore.
It took me some time but I know now, that relationships are complicated, they all need work. It’s worth it.
But no relationship will ever be quite as important as this one. After all, we have a lifetime, every minute. Together.