Unfortunately life will always have it’s share of haters coming your way and with the evolution of a life lived online there is even more opportunity for those ‘keyboard warriors’ as they have become known, to anonymously attack and offend anyone they take a dislike to.
Now, growing up I was always taught that if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all, but it seems that social media has given a large group of people a forum to openly hate – and here is why I think the only way to deal with that is to love even more…
I had a troll at the weekend – and not the pink fluffy kind! This was someone who anonymously attacked me via this blog – not because they had an opinion on my words or wanted to disagree with me but because they wanted to attack me personally and really get me where it hurts – criticising my friends and my looks/writing/blog in a vile way. Of course the email address was a fake one because these people are not strong enough to stand by their words, they’d rather hide and smirk and feel somehow superior for having ruined someone’s day..
I don’t understand this at all! It was a bit of a shock to me although I believe I need to be prepared for it if I choose to write openly for all to see…
I may not understand it but I do know that the one thing these people hate, is to see that their actions, instead of causing pain, have caused great joy! When I posted to my facebook friends that this had happened to me I received so many messages of support and love that I ended up feeling even better than before the troll attacked – so – that didn’t work out too well for them did it! Not only that but my friends hopped to it and made me feel like a Queen! Here is what my lovely Lucy had to say and it resonated with SO many of us I needed to share…
To my darling friend,
You tell me this evening that your website has been targeted by a ‘troll’. A sad noun which has only come about in recent years to describe someone who insults others online, under the cowardly cover of a fake email address.
You know that having an online business opens you up to comments, good, bad and indifferent but you could never be fully prepared for receiving a nasty, personal insult in your inbox.
You’re not alone – I’m no stranger to trolls either. When you do what we do, you have to accept that some people just don’t understand it, may openly dislike it, or feel threatened or offended by our work. Sadly, they don’t take the time to find out about me before they attack either.
It shouldn’t bother me, nor should it you, my dear friend. But we are both sensitive souls, we both work to help people and unfortunately, any criticism cuts deep.
I know it actually hurts.
Even though we know it’s not true. Even though we know it comes from jealousy or ignorance, it still hurts.
We protect our vulnerable hearts as best we can, we have each others’ backs, build ourselves up, lift our chins and keep trucking on.
But when someone stabs us with their scorpions tail accuracy, it really hurts.
Us sensitive souls are always at risk of deep pain. We wear our hearts on our sleeves, we rarely worry about our own issues if someone stands before us in need. We would never insult someone, bad mouth or criticise, we seek to resolve, to empathise, to understand the other person’s point of view.
So to us, this activity is alien. Shocking. Saddening.
But it is not true.
They don’t know you. They don’t see the beauty within you that I do. They don’t see your incredible heart and your healing soul.
Their comments are nothing more than the jealous utterings of an incomplete soul. Send them love and shut the door on them my lovely. If they are unwilling to bring their concerns to your door and discuss them like adults then they are not worth your pain.
Whilst you lick your war wounds, my friend, I want to say this one thing… sensitive people like you are not weak – we are lovers, carers and empaths.
We will keep changing the world, one starfish at a time.
Keep shining your light. Shine it brightly for all to see.
For every troll there are a hundred stars, stars who want to life you up, love you and support your work.
For those stars know that standing by you makes the universe a brighter place.
Much love to you my dear friend.
I felt I needed to write about this here because I now realise that so many people I know have been through similar experiences and it’s sadly becoming more and more common.
Then there is the scary reality we are all trying not to panic about with the current political situation. When an openly bigoted and hateful person is in charge of the free world and making huge decisions every day that are rewinding the progress of our social development, it’s very easy to fear that hate will take over and history will repeat itself.
I was told by a very good friend once that whenever you see a horrifying situation – look for the people helping. Focus on them. There are always good people trying to help. Join in with them and use our voices to to rally against the fear instead of allowing it to overwhelm us.
I for one will continue supporting all the amazing women in my life and boosting them whenever they may need me to. I won’t allow the haters to bring me down because of course that’s what they want. I will find a little bit of empathy for them and how unfulfilled they must feel if attacking others is a sport.
After all, the whole inspiration behind this site was women empowering and supporting women.
Thanks for listening ladies, you can hear more from the amazing Lucy here..